Zombie outbreak, 33 AD

One of the first recorded zombie outbreaks was documented at the time of Jesus’ death.

Zombie mini-apocalypses must happen often enough in that part of the world that they’re not even worth recording. Come on! No one else even mentions it! I gotta hand it to whoever wrote the book of Matthew for having the foresight to include this enlightening event in the most infallible book ever written. If it hadn’t been for him, we’d only have one zombie stumbling around on Easter Sunday…..

I don’t know how they’re defending against the zombies. We do know that none of the undead made it to the city until Sunday

This is as well documented as the injunction to condemn gay sex, so you’d think it would get as least as much attention.

Here’s the quotation:

 51And, behold, the veil of the temple was rent in twain from the top to the bottom; and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent;

52And the graves were opened; and many bodies of the saints which slept arose,

53And came out of the graves after his resurrection, and went into the holy city, and appeared unto many.

54Now when the centurion, and they that were with him, watching Jesus, saw the earthquake, and those things that were done, they feared greatly, saying, Truly this was the Son of God.

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