Florida adopts Kansas periodic table

In a surprise move today, Florida’s state education committee adopted a new standard for chemistry science classes. “Why should biology get all the attention? We have to have balanced educational standards in chemistry as well,” said committee member Denise O’Liarty-Ratsarse. The periodic table is only a theory. Those Medeleevists are trying to suppress scientific debate. We want to see a fair treatment of all theories. Besides, the Bible doesn’t mention hydrogen, so how do we know it even exists?”

Periodic table only a theory

Church disclaimers

Local council in shock challenge to Catholic dogma

… Beginning with tonight’s evening masses, priests will be legally obliged to read out the disclaimer – the exact wording of which has been provided by the council – which reads as follows:

“Congregants should be aware of the gaps or problems in the Catholic theory of transubstantiation, including, but not limited to, the Protestant notion that the bread and wine are merely symbolic, the opinions of other religions on the life of Christ, and the lack of conclusive scientific evidence available to support this theory.”

Explaining the borough’s decision, Councilor Burt Blaydon (Con., Windynook), said: “The council feel it is important that borough residents realise that the Catholic version of Christianity is only a theory and not written in stone. This is not an attempt to cause offence, but equally we shouldn’t offend those members of the congregation who hold alternative views on the nature of bread and wine.”

—Posted by Paul Sims (hat tip to Pharyngula)

And don’t forget the warning sticker:

warning sticker


Is there danger
Humorous Pictures
see more crazy cat pics

…in your bottled water?

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Tricks of Expelled exposed

This article points out the rhetorical tactics of the producers of Expelled:

  • A double standard by TV commentators
  • The words being used
  • The words not being used
  • Misappropriation of rights of free speech

If you let these tricks mis-lead you, you’re the April fool.

Expelled Exposed

That’s a funny place to see a penguin

The BBC has released a new video of penguin behavior.

flying penguins

Are you really a tech writer?

There are some people who seem to know the Mysteries—the inner workings of the world, such as what makes traffic lights change and why there’s less air pollution now than there was thirty years ago. And they’re not scientists.

Andrew Brooke has a simple test to help you find out if you’re really a tech writer.

Controversial ‘pro-bullying’ bill passes U.S. House

The Mercury World Report has this story:

WASHINGTON–A controversial “pro-bullying” bill, identified by the White House as its top educational priority in the 2005 legislative year, passed the House yesterday by a 227-204 vote that fell largely along partisan lines.

President Bush praised Republican lawmakers for their “get tough” stance on the nation’s weak and craven children. “Today we reverse a decades-long trend of favoring the weak over the strong,” Bush proclaimed. “America was built by bullies, or at least built by victims under the bullies’ iron-fisted rule. And yet liberals and educators would have us turn our back on our own heritage.

“Some say the bully has low self-esteem,” Bush said. “Nonsense. The bully is certain of his place in the world and isn’t afraid to demand it. If he hasn’t done his homework, he’ll take someone else’s. He doesn’t ask the U.N.’s permission; he just takes it. And if he has to bloody a nose or two, well by God he’ll do it. He’s a can-do kid, not a whiner.”

The bill carves out $34 million from the No Child Left Behind budget for strategy counseling and legal defense funds for the nation’s bullies. In addition, the bill allows bullies to divert all stolen lunch money into privatized, tax-free accounts.

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